KingdomView, Vol. V, Issue 6
Scripture: 1 Chronicles 22:5
Series: CNLT Focus on the Family Series
Sermon Summary
For those of us who are Floridians, every year we are encouraged to prepare for hurricane season (June – November). Many Floridians comply with this advice and secure emergency items: nonperishable food, batteries, and medications along with other precautionary hurricane readiness supplies. Similarly, I believe singles should prepare themselves for marriage (if they desire to one day marry) as they have probably thought about what they would desire in a potential mate. If you are single, have you thought about what somebody might want in you as a spouse? Hmm, have you prepared yourself to be marriageable? Just as you prepare yourself for those mundane daily activities in life, you should also prepare for marriage. In our lesson text found in 1 Chronicles 22, we discover that David understood the importance of preparation. He prepared building materials for the construction of the Temple that would one day be built by his son, Solomon (1 Chronicles 22:2-5). God would not allow David to build His house because he was a man of war that had shed much blood (1 Chronicles 22:7, 8). Consequently, since David could not build it, he would ensure that his son would have what he needed to fulfill this task. This article will echo this principle and provide some practical insights on preparing for marriage based upon Dr. Willie Richardson’s book, Reclaiming the Urban Family: How to Mobilize the Church as a Family Training Center. I have extracted two points from chapter six, Training Single Christians for Marriage, which emphasizes self-examination and marriage readiness indicators.
I. SELF-EXAMINATION for readiness for marriage
A. Educational Readiness (Maximize educational capacity)
B. Occupational Readiness (Acquire a marketable skill)
C. Relational Skills Readiness (Possess good people skills)
The Bible is the book on relationships―relationships with God, with other people and with ourselves.
Philippians 2:4
4 do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. NASB
Colossians 3:13
13 bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. NASB
1 Thessalonians 5:11
11 Therefore encourage one another, and build up one another, just as you also are doing. NASB
Interpersonal relational skills should be well-developed before we are married. Single adults consciously need to try to develop these skills, such as
o Loving others
o Receiving love from others
o Being unselfish
o Handling anger
o Forgiving others
o Tolerating people whose personalities are irritating
o Sharing with and giving to others
o Submitting to others
o Being effective in personal communications
o Working through disagreements
o Appreciating how others differ from you
o Showing respect toward others
D. Spiritual Readiness (Christian disposition)
- A single person must understand God’s divine design for roles in marriage and family, and
- Have developed a firm commitment to the consistent worship of God and personal spiritual growth
II. The Notable Indicators for Marriage Readiness
1. The willingness to accept and learn the responsibilities of marriage
2. Have faith and trust in God for a mate
3. Good managers of one’s money
Good money management includes
o Being able to hold a job
o Living by a budget
o Saving money for marriage
o Owning something (car, etc)
o Having good credit
4. Ability to take care of oneself
5. Emotional stability
6. Trustworthiness and reliability
7. A willingness to face, deal with, and work through problems
8. Industriousness, orderliness, and cleanliness (there is no place for laziness in marriage)
9. A willingness to give up a singles mentality
Reflection
1. What steps have you taken to prepare for marriage?
2. Are you secure in who you have become as person?
3. Have you studied God’s Word to understand your role as a future husband or wife?
4. Are you truly submitted to the authority of Scripture?
5. What areas in your life that need improvement before you consider getting married?
Go Deeper
Additional Reading:
1. Haman Cross Jr., A Manual for Christian Dating and Courtship
2. Clark N. Warren, Finding the Love of Your Life